Emotional energy: letter to A

On making a decision:

Well, this was an exercise in self discipline. My meditation mentor said that emotional energy is high intensity and very fast. It likes to act on impulse. And to fund its activities, it likes to borrow from the body/mind. And when it sucks energy, it makes one exausted. INDEED! I am completely incapacitated. The torment just wiped me out. Plus getting a sunburn and not sleeping one night, and I am a complete mess, crying every 2 seconds at anything. I am afraid that not sleeping at night would make me like this in Florida - or maybe it won't because my mind and my emotions will be united.

My meditation mentor said that we are all slaves to emotions, women usually are more prone. And that it is necessary to give ourselves just a minute of break, to get out of that grip. Just wash dishes, pick mail, garden, whatever - just FOCUS, so that the mind gets clear.

I taught a new dad, over the phone, to massage babies, and they are responding very favorably.


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Good luck with your father in law (dieing from cancer). It doesn't affect you except via your husband, and it has to happen eventually that the old man dies, but it is never easy and your support to hubby is needed and also to your kids as the hubby is preoccupied.

No words

There are many things worth writing about. The schlerantus is smelling sweetly and parfuming the night air.

My skin burned and noni helped to soothe the sun burn. It is practically gone.

Local soap made of kukui nut oil is the best thing. The soap is by Indigenous Soap. I tried their 'Aina soap. 'Aina means "land". Malama ka 'Aina means take care of the land.

African dance heals injuries in neck and pelvis. Because Africans dance it all the time, that's why they are so healthy and in such great shape. It works.

I heard a newborn baby girl "talk". She was crying but in a voice that was SO CLEAR and SO MELODIC and I was completely floored. It was simply stunning and very touching.

My mom said: why don't you get one? Like it was a kitten, so you just get 'em as you wish.

I planted a new garden, with flowers and colors. It has pink, yellow, orange, purple, red, and very pale beigeish-pink with varrigated leaves. It all looks very nice. It was so much fun making it. The whole neighborhood was just smiling. It is very magical.

There was some crickets last night. That's good, crickets, frogs, dragonflies, etc are all ecological indicators - when they are present, the environment is still relatively clean and healthy.

I learned about emotions. Emotions are very high intensity energy and when they get rampant and start stealing from other centers, like the body and the mind, they completely exaust everyone. The key is to separate from the grip, from the slavery to emotion. Just go do something that focuses and engages the mind. Like washing dishes, picking up mail, etc.

Decision making

Since I have to make some decisions, and I am really bad at it, I talked with my spiritual mentors, all of them.

This response was helpful:
first, focus on the problem at hand, not the secondary issues. Money, time, energy, etc. are all secondary.

First, decide what you really want to do. Then you will figure out the secondaries, like money and time.
Then, decide how you can help the most.

The trick is to get out the emotions and just use the mind, rationally. Emotions are impulsive and they want to take over and do things on the spur of the moment, and for that they suck the energy out of everything else.

How to get unstuck: breaking habits

Amplify Life

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life gear massage chair

Somehow I posted this by mistake into my blog on conscious relationships. Here it is now, in the proper blog.

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Our local massage store had Earthlite Vortex on sale for $450, regularly $490. Ouch. The owner showed me the chair - it is nice! lightweight, easy to adjust, comfortable, nice color...
Online, the same chair can be bought for $270 and shipped to Hawaii for $350 total. But it takes 2 weeks.
So, I spent 100$ in the store on other stuff, so that I wouldn't feel guilty for not spending the rest of 450$, and decided to order it online and rent the chair from the store for one day if it doesn't arrive on time.

ALso, I called ALL massage schools and asked them if anyone is selling a chair. One teacher came back with a number, I called - that woman was unwilling to spend the time to tell me what brand the chair was... it was like she was waiting for me to do all the work, come to her house when she wanted me to and just buy it.

Meanwhile, another add showed up on Craig's list, which I was carefully watching. I had a "wanted" add there that people answered in silly ways - trying to sell me body cushions or recliner massage chairs... So when this new add showed up, I immediately called - it was already Tuesday evening and I needed chair for Sunday 8am...

Luckily this woman was very professional and I made an appointment to see the chair the next day, I went there and bought it. She asked for $150. The chair was in good condition, barely used, and the lady had a good vibe so I felt ok buying the chair from her.

I have done chair massages before quite a bit but only in "controlled office environment" of people coming to me, and never for 4 hrs at a stretch; second, this farmer's market just opened this weekend and I wasn't sure how it would go - where exactly my booth would be, i.e. how much hauling I would have to do, what would heavy traffic of "people off the street" in hot sweaty weather with mascaras melting and hands sticking after eating lunch do to my chair, etc; so - I decided it was best to wait and experiment with this cheap chair and see how I like it.

It is LifeGear chair. It is rather big and heavy, hard to carry. However, I need it to go to farmer's market once, drive my car to my booth, unload right there, once a week. And work on people outdoors, in heat. I need a sturdy chair that cleans well, the weight is less important. For 150$, I can carry it once a week. IF I WERE TO DO THIS MORE OFTEN, I would definitely buy a lighter chair, it is worth it. Carrying this chair is rather difficult. I am almost 6ft and very strong, if I were smaller and/or more delicate, I would not carry this thing around at all. It could throw your back out. So, maybe down the road, I will invest into another chair. I will look on the craig's list first.

It looks very nice. The black upholstery is matted and looks like velvet; not like black plastic, whew, I was concerned about that :) The silver aluminum and the black upholstery looks suave. The chair is definitely sturdy, the aluminum bars are really huge.

The adjustments are not too many but - hey, I don't want too many. I want to quickly get people on and off. Usually they take 10-15 mins on the chair so adjusting it perfectly is not worth it. It has to be simple adjustment that can be done in 1 minute or less.

I have done chair massages before quite a bit but only in "controlled office environment" of people coming to me, and never for 4 hrs at a stretch; second, this farmer's market just opened this weekend and I wasn't sure how it would go - where exactly my booth would be, i.e. how much hauling I would have to do, what would heavy traffic of "people off the street" in hot sweaty weather with mascaras melting and hands sticking after eating lunch do to my chair, etc; so - I decided it was best to wait and experiment with this cheap chair and see how I like it.

It has to be comfortable enough - and it is.

The spas around here use this chair.... So it is definitely good enough.

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MUCH LATER:
it is kinda heavy and clunky. However, after dancing African for about 3 days, the chair seems feather light :) :) :)

West African rhythms available!

Fara Tolno compiled 50 West African rhythms:

Rhythm Reference Project

So for 40$ you can download the traditional version of it. For 100$ you can download traditional, ballet, and Mamadu versions of the same rhythms.

This is a good deal! THe money is going to help open a school in Guinea, West Africa, for traditional teachers to share their knowledge of drum, dance, balafon, cora, etc. and other aspects of the traditional African culture. WHich is quickly dieing. It needs to be preserved.

good feeling: healing movement therapy

Yousuff Koumbassa was here teaching a West African dance class for 2 days. The guy is an amazing amazing dancer, the best I have ever seen. The next best dancer imo is Chrysogone Diangouaya, Congolese dancer, but he is a little younger and a little less mature than Yousuff. Yousuff has presence, very deep presence. His class is completely about technique and completely free of any ego. Yousuff is totally present yet he is completely absent from the picture, and the Art is invited and comes in. So that frees us dancers to just Be too, and to experiment and experience the Dance.

The directions we got from Yousuff were: take your time; and feel, have a good feeling, enjoy the movement. "Take your time" does not mean "slow it down". African dance is really fast. How he explained it is: don't push, don't force yourself, let the movement happen. And enjoy it. Have a good feeling.

Dancing with this attitude is extremely healing. I was not tired or sore anymore. Everything just flows. I danced for hours, stayed up late, and still was full of energy. (Little nap in the afternoon and some good food also helps :)

More importantly, I was free to be, and to feel, and to experience myself. Yousuff created space for us. Because he wasn't in the picture but only Art, there was a lot of space for us to engage with the Art. SOmehow I got more connected with my body and with myself, and a lot of things became clearer.

Also, my body was "lubricated" and healed quite well, some neck issues and shoulder issues and pelvic issues got better because I was warmed up and stretched out. I also massaged it myself and got it even better.

There are two centers that do 10 day colon cleansing programs:

http://www.alohaainawellnesscenter.com

http://angelfarms.com

The first one costs 1750 plus 40-50 per night for accomodations.
The second one costs 3600 plus accomodations.

From what they said to me (I spoke with both owners) they do basically the same thing: 2 hours of colonics, then maybe a massage or a session for emotional release, then they give you food and send you away for the day.

Why do they cost so differently? Do we get what we pay for, or is something else at play? With these things, the healing skill is what we should pay for. However, high price doesn't necessarily mean high skill.

3600 dollar place must be rakinig in big bucks, because they could be making about 40000 dollars per cleanse, since they accept 12 people.

Even the 1750 place rakes in quite a bit of dough.

The 3600 dollar place owner looks great, I met her and she absolutely glows. SHe is a good advertisement for her program.

The other owner looks good on the web, but I have never met her in person to really know.

I need to meditate on this....

proper use of complaining

There is a new dancer around here, she just moved in from some big cities and found herself in a small place with no dance troups. And she kept on complaining about it to all of us. I haven't heard a single positive word. So I sat to talk with her and she kept on complaining how she couldn't find work and how little work she found was very lousy and iffy, etc. She made her living for 15 years by dancing in Broadway shows and in many other "fancy" outfits. There is nobody around here with that kind of experience, training, and skill.

Well, we just finished a dance conference. That new dancer is a star, she is a super good dancer. The camp teachers noticed her too, she is good.

So no wonder she kept complaining, and so bitterly. She is excellent and she cannot find a place to fit. There are no dance troups and shows on Oahu where people with 15 years of professional dancing can fit.

So I told her - and other dance teachers who have their dance companies confirmed - to open her own dance company. And to teach classes, if she is interested. She is a rich resource that we need to utilize and learn from.

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After some people commented on this blog, I thought a lot more about this question. Indeed, why is this dancer not teaching, when she has all that experience and skill? How come she was not invited to teach some of the Saturday morning classes or some other classes? She is so experienced and so good, anyone interested in dance should jump at the chance to study from someone so senior. I would. If she doesn't like to teach, but only to perform, that's a different story. I hope she would teach too.

The community on Oahu can only benefit from the resource. We are fortunate to have the classes we have that have been going on for a while, so that the community had a chance to get established and grow. Other islands may not even have anything African going. Oahu has 4 permanent dance classes, 3 permanent drum classes, two performing for-pay dance troups. Yeehaa! We are cruising good, the numbers are increasing. Bringing in more experienced people can help to have more knowledge and more diversity.

For some, African stuff is a way to shake their butt, to exercise, to attract male attention, to be in the limelight, to hang out with friends and have fun, ... many other reasons. The main reason is preserving the ancient knowledge and culture, the Native knowledge. That reason asks for setting aside all personalized ego preferences. We are constantly asked to keep on committing to something much larger than our own agendas.

Importance of good guides

The new Self Realization magazine with the CD came in, and I listened it several times "as a background" because the monk who is speaking has a thick Dutch accent, is old, and tends to mumble and speak fast.

so finally I set the volume way up high :) and listened to it very carefully. Wow! What he had to say was very amazing and very helpful. He was talking about remembering God in times of challenges. How those "dry" times are the times we are tested to see if we really mean God.

He said that spiritual life and married life are just about the same - it starts with a honeymoon and lots of enthusiasm and very high expectations. Our old habits are pushed into background. Then all this exciting newness wears out and our old habits kick in again, strong. And that's what we need to wrestle with and stick to it.
Some quit and go back to old habits, some quit and look for another relationship and the exciting honeymoon stage :)

So, subscribe to srf-yogananda.org magazine, it is way cool and very useful.